Choose You: The Essential Journey of Self-Care for Women
In today’s episode, we delve into a topic that resonates deeply with many women: Choose You. This powerful message reminds you to prioritize yourself, especially in a world that often demands constant giving without replenishment.
The Strain of Constant Giving
As women, we are natural givers, nurturers, and lovers. We pour ourselves into our families, our work, and our communities. But in the process, we can find ourselves drained, burnt out, and even depressed. Society often encourages this selflessness, but the truth is, if you continue to give without taking the time to replenish yourself, there will come a point where you have nothing left to give. This can lead to severe consequences, including depression and, in extreme cases, death.
A Story of Self-Rediscovery
To illustrate this, let me share a story. Many years ago, I had a friend and colleague who was going through marital difficulties. The stress was evident in her appearance and demeanour—she no longer looked like the vibrant, confident woman I once knew. Her struggles at home had taken such a toll that she often came to work looking dishevelled, sometimes not even having brushed her hair.
Concerned, I approached her one day and asked what was going on. She confided in me that she was overwhelmed by the responsibilities in her marriage, both financially and emotionally. I could see how this was wearing her down, and I told her bluntly, “If you continue like this, one day you will die. And if you die, your body won’t even be cold before your husband remarries.”
My intention wasn’t to disparage her husband but to make her realize the importance of caring for herself. If something were to happen to her, life would go on for everyone else. This realization was a turning point for her.
To help her start on the path to self-care, I offered her some clothes and accessories I was selling then. I encouraged her to revamp her wardrobe as a first step in reclaiming her self-esteem and confidence. This simple act made a significant difference in her outlook. She began to regain her self-confidence and started making choices that prioritized her well-being.
The Importance of Choosing Yourself
This story is a reminder to all women: Choose You. Your self-worth and identity are crucial. If you lose sight of these, you risk drowning in a sea of rejection, abuse, pain, and shame. The Bible says in Psalm 139:14, “I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made.” This is a reminder that you are beautiful, valuable, and worthy of love—especially from yourself.
In Ephesians 2:10, the Bible also tells us that we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works. This means that God took His time to create you with a purpose. But to fulfil this purpose, you must first love and care for yourself. After all, the command to “love your neighbour as yourself” implies that you must first love yourself before you can love others.
Breaking Free from Guilt and Cultural Expectations
Many women feel guilty for prioritizing themselves as if it’s selfish to put their needs first. However, it’s essential to remember that if you don’t take care of yourself, you won’t be able to care for others effectively. For women in abusive situations, this is especially important. Staying in such an environment not only harms you but also your children. Choosing yourself might mean making the difficult decision to leave for the sake of your well-being and your children’s future.
Self-Care: A Biblical Perspective
Even Jesus recognized the need for self-care. Mark 1:35 tells us that Jesus often withdrew to lonely places to pray, to spend time alone, and to reconnect with God. This was His way of replenishing Himself so that He could continue to minister to others. How many of us take time to do the same?
Whether you’re single, married, divorced, or a mother, it’s crucial to carve out time for yourself amidst the chaos of life. Without this, you risk losing touch with who you are. And once lost, finding yourself again can be incredibly challenging.
Setting Healthy Boundaries
Part of choosing yourself is learning to set healthy boundaries. It’s okay to decide who gets to be in your space—both mentally and physically. Sometimes, even those closest to us can cause unnecessary stress. It’s important to prioritize your well-being by creating boundaries that align with your values and faith.
Let your choices be God-centered. When your decisions are rooted in God’s will, they are never selfish. Instead, they benefit not only you but everyone around you. Just as Jesus set boundaries with His disciples, knowing when to step away and when to engage, we too must learn to balance our responsibilities with self-care.
Recognizing Your True Value
As women, our value often gets twisted or eroded by societal expectations and cultural norms. But our true worth lies in our relationship with God. He is our creator, and the Bible is our manual. To understand our value, we must go back to the source—the Word of God.
We are fearfully and wonderfully made, and our worth is not determined by the world’s standards but by God’s. When we recognize this, we can boldly choose ourselves without fear or guilt. Fear is one of the devil’s most powerful tools, but when we trust in God’s plan for us, we can overcome this fear and live in the fullness of who we are meant to be.
Choosing You Benefits Everyone
Ultimately, choosing yourself is not just about you. When you make God-centered decisions, it benefits everyone around you. Just as Jesus’ time alone with God allowed Him to minister more effectively, your self-care enables you to give more to others. By choosing you, you create a ripple effect of positivity and strength in your community.
In the coming episodes, we will delve deeper into the many aspects of choosing yourself. This series aims to empower every woman to recognize her value, set healthy boundaries, and live in the fullness of who she is in Christ.
Thank you for joining me in this important conversation. Stay tuned for more insights on how to choose you.
Blessings,
Minister Kayla.